I need to learn to let go, and Understand How I Feel!

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In my brief span of 20 years I have witnessed good and bad relationships between people, my mother's, her friend's, my grandmother's, my friend's, and my father's relationships as they have gone bad. Now what boggles me is how this has affected me, I always thought I would never care for some one enough to do crazy things. Most people would say you haven't loved until you wanted to kill someone, and they are right. I would never actually kill some one, for I am way to smart to put my self into a position like that, but I will admit that one does let the thought slip into ones mind when influenced by love that you cannot have. At a young age a vowed to never ever even think like any one of the men that ever graced my life through dating my mother.

I cannot even see how I have this thing that I once said to never allow into my life with the exception of my mother. A few years ago I would have laughed if you asked me if I wanted kids, but upon being in such a strong relationship things changed and I though about life differently. Some thing, I will agree are for the better but a few I deal with now as constraining factors in my life. The reason this is oppressing me is probably for lack of someone to make me feel good about myself other than myself in my earlier years. You cannot stop it, it is love that takes hold even when you are that coldest, most non caring person ever, and even if you could drink lead pain and laugh, you cannot stand tall in the face of love.

I believe LOVE is a addiction to pleasant chemical reactions that go off inside your brain while participating with another being that you, initially find attractive. At a basic level, such as mine, where I have only three people I have ever loved. One must wonder how it could be such a controlling factor in peoples everyday lives.

I am thankful that I fell in love, because I would not have ended up in as good of a situation as I am now. Because of love, I truly care about myself as a human being. I am healthy and enjoy exercise; I make, work for, and keep goals; Also I like other people more. This is all because someone made ME feel like I was worth something. It is a great feeling, truly addicting, and I understand why people go crazy to get it, but that is not me. Even though it would feel so great to have this feeling in my life everyday, I must stop it now so that it does not control me. As with anything you must take love in moderation, never allowing it to be a deciding factor in your life.

Before I actually experienced love I mad one more vow to myself, this is from a young age (I would say 12). I told myself that I would never allow worldly things control what I do everyday, this is because I saw things like money and cars always taking precedence in the lives of people around me. Unknowing to me was love which can be described in the same way, and with that it slipped into my life under my radar and road block I had worked so hard to build all my life. Thus it was something new and I did not have proper understanding on how to handle it.

Now having a few years to understand and now finally seeing the control it has put into my life. I must inevitably make another vow to myself, and declare it onto the world. These words that come next are to myself only, I do not intend for anyone to take them to heart as their own.

Dear Tony,

I understand your feelings are strong, but I will no longer allow these feelings to control you. I will allow you to have feelings such as love, but only on the understanding that you are not making decisions based on the feeling. Your mind is yours to think with, do not allow it to be persuaded by your heart, just as you would never allow it to be affected by promiscuity, or worldly factors. Love is good, you must understand this, because unlike other things that must be blocked from your mind at all times, this cannot, for when it does you will shut down, and good will not come from the hatred that will be negatively placed into your life from the lack of love. I just want you to remember that I love you, just as much as the two others that you have been blessed to have come across in your life thus far!

With The Most Sincerity,

Anthony Carothers

Here Is My First Single!

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This is the official release of my "The Song" track off of my up n coming "Fast Talker Album"!

The Top 9 Most Wanted Video Game Remakes!

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Honorable Mention
Name: Missile Command
Platform: Arcade, Atari 2600, Atari 5200, Atari 8-bit family, Commodore 64, Game Boy, Game Boy Color, Mobile Phone, PC, PlayStation
Developer: Atari
Release Date: July 1980
Why Its Awesome:
1. The gameplay is simple and effective.
2. The game is not overly complicated.
3. Although not action pact, it is a fast paced game.
4. The history of the game, in relation to the cold war.
5. You get to defend your cities.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Graphics improvement.
2. Add new gameplay mechanics, while not changing the original gameplay.
3. Better sound, and production value all around.
4. CO-OP, and VERSUS, ONLINE.
5. Worldwide Scoreboards.
Note: The reason this game did not make the list was because it was remade for Xbox 360 last year. I just wanted to give a good example of a needed remake.


9.
Name: Duck Hunt
Platform: Famicom, NES, Arcade
Developer: Nintendo R&D1
Release Date: JP April 21, 1984, NA October 18, 1985, EU August 15, 1987
Why Its Awesome:
1. One of the greatest games to ever use a light gun.
2. One of the first games to use a light gun.
3. The dog was loved and hated by all.
4. It also cam with Clay Shooter/Mario Bros
5. The utter simplicity of the gameplay "Ohh a gun, shoot the ducks, RIGHT?"
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Graphics improvement.
2. Make the dog a more vital part of the game.
3. More varied weapons.
4. Make sure to keep clay shooter, it would be awesome in HD!
5. Cross platform.


8.
Name: Contra
Platform: Arcade, Amstrad CPC, Commodore 64, ZX Spectrum, NES, PC MS-DOS, MSX2, Microsoft Windows, Pocket PC, Xbox 360
Developer: Konami
Release Date: Original releases 1987-1990; Xbox 360 Nov 08, 2006
Why Its Awesome:
1. Difficulty.
2. Its like RAMBO in a game.
3. Music was cool.
4. Weapon selection was ok.
5. Great BOSSES.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Updated Graphics.
2. Smoother movement.
3. More weapons.
4. Maybe 3D?
5. CO-OP/VERSUS with cross platform support.
Note: The Xbox 360 version is just a port, not a remake.


7.
Name: Diablo
Platform: PC/MAC, Play Station
Developer: Blizzard
Release Date: January 02, 1997 for North America, 1998 for the rest of the world/PS verions.
Why Its Awesome:
1. The originator of GREAT hack n slash action.
2. Weapon/Armour customization.
3. Level randomization.
4. Classes.
5. Diablo, the final boss.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Graphics update into 3D!!!!
2. Keep the story, but expand on it greatly!
3. More weapon, spells, abilities, classes.
4. Another town, maybe add the second game into the remake.
5. Online versus/ CO-OP/CROSS PLATFORM.


6.
Name: Elder Scrolls I/II
Platform: MS-DOS
Developer: Bethesda Softworks
Release Date: 1994 for Arena/ 1996 for Daggerfall
Why Its Awesome:
1. Big worlds.
2. First of its kind.
3. One of the first 3D games.
4. Lots of monsters.
5. Background story.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Voice acting, bring it to a Oblivion level.
2. Graphics, make rats not able to look at you at all times.
3. The elder scrolls world is big, show it to people, they don't know that Oblivion/Morrowind are a small part of the continents.
4. More action to keep those with low attention spans interested.
5. More FMV's or in game cinematic points.


5.
Name: Punchout
Platform: NES, Gamecube, Wii
Developer: Nintendo IRD
Release Date: 1987
Why Its Awesome:
1. Each opponent has different abilities.
2. There is variation in the moves you can pull off.
3. Mario is in it.
4. It can easily piss you off if you don't know what your doing.
5. Mike Tyson was the main boss at one time.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. 3D would be nice, but keep the perspective.
2. How the player punches is nice, but add to it, give some combos, or different powerups.
3. Make Mario's pants not turn green.
4. Make the characters in the background not all the same color, and 2D.
5. Add Rocky as a boss.


4.
Name: Wipeout
Platform: PlayStation, Sega Saturn, PC MS-DOS, PC Microsoft Windows, PlayStation Network
Developer: Psygnosis
Release Date: November, 1995
Why Its Awesome:
1. FAST paced racing.
2. This isn't a whack Nascar game.
3. You get weapons.
4. Boosters are great to go even faster.
5. Easy game to play.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Graphics are important to a game like this.
2. Soundtrack has to be up to date with allot of great new songs.
3. Racer customization, with the option for different abilities.
4. Online multiplayer, with leader boards.
5. Obstacles would be a great addition to this game, other tahn the traps left my opponents.


3.
Name: Alien VS Predator 2
Platform: PC/MAC
Developer: Monolith Productions, Third Law Interactive
Release Date: October 30, 2001
Why Its Awesome:
1. Gameplay is tight between the races.
2. Plentiful weapons.
3. Scary bad guys.
4. Wonderful sounds.
5. Three stories.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Here, for a remake would be an addition of a new graphics engine, with support for physics.
2. Keep the races similar so that one does not overpower them all, while also giving a refresh to what has been done before.
3. Clean up wall climbing for the aliens, it can be improved.
4. It needs to be a darker more living game, more alien hives, and dripping slime.
5. With darker come more scary, predator, and alien are both terrifying creatures, so make them SCARE YOU SHITLESS.


2.
Name: Vectorman
Platform: Sega Mega Drive/Genesis, Mobile phone, Virtual Console
Developer: BlueSky Software
Release Date: October 24, 1995
Why Its Awesome:
1. Great sidescroller game my personal favorite of the 2d time period.
2. Plentiful weapons.
3. Lots of unique monsters.
4. Great main character, with lots of transformations.
5. Nice soundtrack.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. 3D cell shaded shooter would be the way to go with this game.
2. Not a hardcore shooter like Halo, or COD, but somewhere along th lines of Strangers Wraith.
3. More transformations that make you do interesting things.
4. Huge bosses.
5. Guns need great particle effects, OOOOO SPARKLES.


1.
Name: Final Fantasy VII
Platform: PC, Play Station
Developer: Squaresoft
Release Date: September 7, 1997 for North America
Why Its Awesome:
1. Arguably the greatest Japanese RPG of all time.
2. It made kids like me start to read, even if it was only the expletives of Barret shouting.
3. Huge World to explore.
4. Massive amounts of monsters, big monsters, unique bosses/characters.
5. Lots of armour/weapons/items/spells/customizations.
What Could Be Made Better:
1. Update of the graphics, everyones hands are legos.
2. Voice acting, I would love to hear all of the wonderful characters in this colorful game speak.
3. Add more to the already huge list of monsters, characters, bosses, weapons, spells, items, places.
4. More side quests/expansion on the original story.
5. ....Thats all I have!
Note: To tell you the truth, they could sell the same game with updated graphics, and voice acting and that would be reason enough for me to go out and buy a PS3.

Why Inkjet Printers Suck Baby Duck Feeds Carp I hope no ladies get offended by this!!! The Greatest Valedictorian Speech EVER!

Sorry About The Downtime

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As you can see the website has been down for a few days and I haven't been able to update. This is because the hosting service for the site was upgrading its servers so that they can host with more stability. That is taken care of now, but the site could still go down a few times for a week or so, while they tweak the servers to their optimum performance. Thank you guys for sticking with me, I have some really great news coming in the next week.

First off, I am recording a cd as we speak, and hopefully will be releasing a single off it today. All will be free as I believe music should be. This track is extremely close to me and I hope you guys like it. Also, yesterday me and my homie Chad from back in the day recorded the intro track, and that will also be mastered today, but not released. The cd which I hope to release soon, will have upwards of 6 songs, with guest appearances, HOPEFULLY. I am pretty much going to force Nathan to record a song that we worked on a long time ago, and once he does that I'll have that on the cd too.

So keep checking back, even if the track does not come out today I will post up here again with an article and more information about what will be going down here on the site.

Keeping Yall Updated!

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Hey everyone I'm coming on here just to tell you a little bit about what is going on with me. This in effect will keep you happy until tomorrow when I have a great article I am writing today. Anyway I have been fiddling in allot lately. I have been hanging out with a good friend by the name of Nathan, and we have been working on some instrumentals for me, although we haven't finished any instrumentals, I have one song almost fully written that I will be releasing on here for free. The date that I do so is still not known because I still need to record it and get it sounding right by my standards. Either way this track I am releasing will be part of an EP I will be putting out. Which will consist of probably 5-7 songs. No dates are set in stone yet its something that I feel I need to do, before I get to old, or run out of spice.

The ask a gamer section will be up and running again soon, I have been kinda frustrated by that section, because I haven't had all that great of questions, but I have decided to keep it and only post my answers as videos. This is because the world is to lazy to read and people are more interested in videos. Hopefully this addition will bring more people and provide something enjoyable for the interwebs.

Anyway this weekend was supposed to be exciting, but turned out to be a great disappointment. Me and my homie CJ were going to go to a party on Friday. The party got canceled on the fact that the hostess of the party got sick? Then on Saterday we were supposed to go to Busch Gardens and have great amounts of fun, that didn't happen. We instead went for a bike ride and played football, and proceeded to do nothing, but all is well and people survive. Because next weekend there is another party, and the one we were supposed to go to should happen then also. Well, you guys have a great evening I am off to get on blogtv, and talk about bullshit with people I dont even know!